There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I think your dad took our porno
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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