Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Randomize
