well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
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Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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