Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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