i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Randomize
