i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Randomize
