After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize