at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
His nipple licking is glorious
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