in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
