I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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