Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Randomize
