I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
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