That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
