Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Randomize
