i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
so let's talk penis.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
