I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
is it fun? or sober?
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize