i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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