found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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