That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
