My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Randomize