Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
what day is it and did you see me today?
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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