my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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