Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
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