is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
