This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
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