So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize