ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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