if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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