Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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