Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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