Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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