You surviving the open bar?
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The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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