i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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