Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Randomize
