I feel like abortions should bother me more
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize
