sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
