All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
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