At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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