He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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