He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
