I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
