We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
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The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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