Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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