Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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