I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
