I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
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