She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
She announced her abortion via fbk
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
