Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Randomize
