That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize