So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize