If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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